Hurting People

I wanted to share this concept I heard a while back when I first started searching for personal development content. John Maxwell has some principles that he teaches about the kind of people we will deal with. The principle that jumped out at me and caught my attention was about people who are mean and hurt others. He said "hurting people hurt people". It was more like an epiphany when he said that. I recalled several moments of people who have said things that were hurtful, or could have been hurtful. I don't know if it is how I have grown up or if being a man has anything to do with it, but I normally take comments like that with a grain of salt. I don't let things stick to me very easily. Those times that I thought of when people would more or less attack me, I reflected a little deeper and it just struck me. All of those comments were out of their own broken self image. It is a defense mechanism to make ourselves feel more significant in those areas where we are lacking or failing.People don't always realize this when they are doing it. I even thought of times where I wasn't very nice to someone and I could see myself doing it because I felt insignificant in some area. Or maybe it was a way to become the alpha of the group.
This has given me a whole new perspective on bullies or people who are always climbing on top of others to get what they want. Every time I hear someone being derogatory or slamming someone else, I actually feel sorry for them and pray that God would strengthen them. Somewhere inside they are hurting and are coping with the pain by bringing others down to their level.
When I see things this way, it is very hard to be mad at them. It's like watching someone trip and fall beside you and they try to grab you on the way down. It is a natural reaction. But if we took the time to realize what is happening, it would be easier to just take the fall by yourself and ask for assistance from that person to get back up.

So next time you feel hurt by a comment or you are in a situation where someone is belittling you, just remember that there is probably something that is hurting that person. They need your help rather than your anger or disappointment.